Santa Claws

Santa Claws

Characters:

Raven: A nice soft-core porn actress, is trying to balance two kids, her job, her falling apart marriage, and her stalker neighbor

Laura: A local porn actress, suffers from a rare case of sharp hand rake syndrome.....

Wayne: A young, disturbed dude who is stalking Raven, creepy dude, killed his parents when he was little... Hit in the stomach with a hand rake by Raven.

The Husband: I don’t think hey ever say his name, but he is a very important character, nearly dies after being assaulted my “Santa”......

Santa: Yeah, Wayne’s alter ego kinda thing, kills people with a hand rake, until he is killed with the same rake.




Plot:
Well, you see, Raven is a struggling up and coming actress who finds herself as well as anyone associated with her in grave peril after finding her fellow “workers” dead and dying, killed by her screwed up stalker neighbor Will Raven make it out alive? Will she be able to save her family and friends? Will I ever watch a decent movie??













Review:
Hahaha Wow, what a name Santa Claws Hahaha Ah, well. This seems to be a pretty cheap movie right here, it’s sad to see that the writer of Night Of The Living Dead, has come down to cheap, bloodless, no budget, wannabe slashers. It’s just too cheap and corny to take seriously, and too boring to take it as a Horror-Comedy It’s too bad, the plot seemed actually good, but the bodycount is just to low to keep things entertaining for us, the viewers, and you have the fact that the movie feels like it was only made as an excuse (a bad one) to show naked scream queens, but it can’t be considered as anything besides horror because there’s not enough nudity to call it a skin flick, and there’s not enough intentional humor to call it a comedy(but, trust me, it is funny as hell), and not enough focus on anything besides the crazy stalker to call it anything besides horror I guess I can call it horror, although mainly due to the fact that people wasted money on this, piece of shit

While it may seem that I really hate this movie, I don’t it has it’s good points, but many more bad points, I mean the acting is pretty good, yeah it’s a stretch, but if ya really pay attention (something I don’t recommend) you can see that the cast is really trying As for the directing, I do feel sorry for the fact that the great writer from Night of The Living Dead tried to direct, as it seems he is only good at writing, but I believe he learned his lesson with this mockery of film making. But, if you really want to see it, go ahead, it’s not something I’m planning on ever watching again, but you really want to watch it, just try not to be upset, as for it should only be seen by true slasher fans, due to the fact that for anyone else, it might be too bad for the inexperienced to handle





Gore:
Ha Nothing besides some non-gory hand rake action.



T&A:
There is a lot of nudity for this type of film, so don’t watch it with your girlfriend, unless she won’t be offended by it




Final Rating: 1.5/5


Reviewed By: Ian Berling